Years of my Youth.
A walk with God (:Archive for Church
Thy Word…
Job 5:18 For He bruises, but He binds up;
He wounds, but His hands make whole.
I promise here that when i am set on high
and lifted to safety,
i will remember that i have been lowly
and mourning.
Times where i realize that i am weak,
that He is the One and Only…
who alone is more than sufficient for me.
Yes, Lord, despite the excruciating pain
and unstoppable tears,
my prayer is still the same:
Create in me a pure heart,
and renew in me a right spirit.
Cloth me in Your Presence,
and make me bear fruits in abundance.
Anna, if you happen to see this post (which is not supposed to be here), i want to thank you once again, from the bottom of my heart, for knowing God and loving Him so deeply, so that you can be such an effective channel of God’s blessing to me in my darkest hours and weakest moments. You are full of beauty and faith, to allow Christ to live and speak through you!
Also want to take this time to thank various people who have offered invaluable encouragement and support during this short but intense period: Mum, Dear Timliang, Charles, Allan, Yassy, Glenn, Ian, Gwen, Timloh, Daniel Loh, Tina, Lisa, Liu Yang, Sharon, Wilfred and Charmaine. <3
Epiphany
=D Finally, a more tangible (scholarly) career goal to fight for!
Thanks to the Senior Admin and teachers for giving that pragmatic and timely mass PC lecture to address serious academic matters. Need it and appreciate it!
There’s a scholarship i feel called to achieve (if it’s truly God’s will, it will come to pass. i’ll do my outmost best on my part to attain it). i shall not reveal the name of it nor the organization that offers it as of now, because i’m not 100% sure yet. Basically it requires me to:
1) Obtain excellent academic grades (you know what to do, just do it!)
2) Excellent SATs score (ok set, i’m taking it in May)
3) Excellent NAPFA score (pure Gold again? Why not?! God is the same yesterday, today and forever.)
4) Good CCA records (do CASL & NYAA logging seriously)
5) Strong leadership qualities (thanks to BB & class & school)
6) Excel somewhere
7) Possess a strong interest in something
Come to think of it, everything just links! Coming to AC, taking IB, the one-of-a-kind subject combi (woohoo, my Y6 teachers are cool. And did i mention? Mr. Chirnside R.O.C.K.S BIG TIME!!!), joining BB, signing up for NYAA and now with the future before me…
God has been faithful and good to me, to say the very least. So i will continue to trust in Him wholeheartedly, knowing that He will direct my path according to His Will and for the glory of His Name. i know it will be from faith to faith and glory to glory. (=
*******
The FireAC meeting we had just now was heartwarming and interesting. An uplifting time of encouragement and affirmation among other things. (:
*******
i’m looking forward to Primers’ Outing @ East Coast this coming Saturday, (special) dinner & church =). It will be profoundly delightful, i know. A good little respite after an (somewhat) unearthly week. <3
On my mark. Get set.
i know the limitations of New Year’s Resolutions, then again, i personally find it highly helpful to set the year right. It works for me (:
So here, you shall be my witness:
Spirituality
1) Personal walk with God
* Write in a spiritual journal every day, without fail.
- Notes from FireAC sharings, chapel, devotions, BBBS and sermons
- Revelations from the Bible during QT
- Prayers
* follow church’s Bible Reading Plan
* Intercede for the school etc every Saturday morning before parade begins
* TRY to keep the Sabbath day holy
2) School ministries
* FireAC
- Step in and step up according to God’s command
- Guard Christ’s enthroned position jealously
- Love my comrades in truth and in purity
- Be a good role model to my juniors in all aspects
* Class and beyond
- Be more sensitive and caring
- Be a better testimony in all aspects
Friendships
1) Focus on significant ones, and those i’m called into
2) Cut down idle socialization
3) Remember friends’ birthdays and at least be a well-wisher
Work
1) Academic
* Now a priority, so MUCH MORE time, focus, and energy need to be poured in
* Finish all my homework before play
* Be more generous and helpful
2) BB
* Dare to take frontline responsibilities
* Stop being perfectionistic and get work over and done with asap
* Love and get to know my juniors more
Leisure
* Maximum 5min on Facebook during school days (birthday wishes & wall post reply etc)
Maximum 30min on weekends (upload photos, catch up with friends etc)
* Blog at most once every week
* Exercise at least 3 time per week (excluding PE & BB)
* Do not go out except for special cases
***********************************************
(: This is it, may 2009 be a year of daring to be excellent. In Christ, by Christ and for Christ! =D
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.
2 Timothy 1:7
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.
1 John 5:14-15
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us – whatever we ask – we know that we have what we asked of him.
Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Now, GO!
Rounding up 2008
Once again it is this time of the year…
i was looking through the archives of my blogs, MSN convos, emails, the works i’ve done (BB policy paper, SOP, Bio pracs, commentaries, EE etc etc) and saw God’s hand in it all. Hence i would like to end this year with gratitude and begin 2009 on a note of faith. Christ Jesus my Lord and Saviour has been good to me, indeed He is faithful and true, carrying me through all the ups and downs as promised, and most importantly, granting me a deeper revelation of Himself.
The year has been the most turbulent so far, particularly on the spiritual and emotional level (not an intelligent year as i hoped, sadly). It’s difficult to unload thoughts and feelings from my mind all at once.. but i’ll try.
Spirituality
i’ve been exceedingly and immensely blessed in this respect as i made this the top priority of the year. Thanks be to God, and my dear brothers and sisters in Christ who edified me in Spirit and in Truth! These are some amazing people i would especially like to acknowledge and thank:
1. John Tay
i can never thank you enough for taking the risk and became my mentor in FireAC. Thank you for teaching me how to pray & intercede with with every fiber of my being and delight in it (because to be with Christ is most delightful), for inspiring me to be more firmly rooted in the Word, for admonishing me when my judgment is clouded, for reassuring me (of God’s unfailing grace and faithfulness) when i realized the gravity of my sins, for urging me to be zealous & sacrificial in doing God’s work, for the books (The Kneeling Christian. An Acceptable Sacrifice. Back to Jerusalem), and for praying that i’ll love Jesus through and through. You have became a role model of passion, compassion and humility (tho i really disliked your pride when i first got to know you) to me. By refusing to take credit for yourself but giving all glory to God whenever i thank you, you have shown yourself faithful and humble before the Lord, and that is true courage and strength. i will take up the blazing baton and pass it on to my junior in good condition, by the grace and mercy of God as well. May our God Himself continue to preserve you and sanctify you as you delight in Him, so that you may be more and more Christlike!
2. Caleb Lin
Like i said, all the antagonistic “arguments” (as you put it) we exchange helped to put all things into perspective. Thank you for all the challenging questions that pointed me to Christ Himself with His absolute and constant goodness! (: i really do have a lot to learn from you. Thank you for your faithfulness and commitment to God’s work in FireAC and in class, despite all the undesirable happenings throughout the course of the year. Thanks for the yummy food you personally cooked and snacks you bought to share with all (i suppose your locker number is the hottest in ACSi) during gatherings etc. You have been a generous blessing. May God continue to prosper you in all things as your soul prospers with an ever increasing knowledge of Christ Himself!
3. Timothy Lim
(: Your words (spoken and written on blog) and prayer never fail to comfort, encourage and inspire. You have blazed the trail and exhibit the glory of God in so many areas, so remarkably, and yet remain humble and helpful. So thank you for setting a good example (of diligence and perseverance too) in Christ. Thank you for loving and caring for us when we are down, for calling us when we needed someone to talk to and pray with. May God set Himself before you as always, leading you in all wisdom and truth.
4. Kenneth Lim
Thank you for your obedience and faith to establish FireAC and keep it moving. Through serving in this ministry i’ve grown so much in the knowledge of God & people, and forged precious friendship that can last forever (the blood of Christ binds and redeems). Thank you for your brotherly kindness & concern at times, especially when i’m not doing well (such as for mid-years). Some of your words are faith-filled and very inspiring, thank you for speaking life! May God continue to use you mightily and exalt you as you humble yourself before Him, may you abide in Him with joy for He is our portion and hope always. (:
5. Emil Ng
Thank you for encouraging me in the Lord from time to time, for giving me your e-Sword too! xD You have inspired me to worship God in Spirit and in Truth, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for leading worship faithfully in FireAC. i pray that you will have no lack as you abide in Christ and as He mould you in His likeness day by day.
6. Daniel Chng
Thank you for receiving me so warmly into FireAC and BB in the beginning of the year, and for trusting me enough to share the issues of your heart (it’s still safe with me) during that period of time too. Thank you for showing me your spiritual journal, which touched me deeply (the imagery of the silver and the silversmith). You also inspired me to love the Word. May God grant you the courage to glorify Him even in adverse situations and draw you closer to Himself as you seek Him.
7. Mr Charles Ng
Thank you Sir for building us up in God through sharing during FireAC pitstops, Primers Bible Studies and blogging (your blog is one of the most edifying one i know of). Thank you for nurturing so many God-fearing men during your service as the OIC of my seniors. i have learnt a lot from God through you. May God grant you the wisdom and discernment to find yourself a wife of noble character and have children who love God wholeheartedly, as you find sufficiency in Christ and seek to glorify Him in all things. (x
8. Timothy Loh
Hello world, this is me thanking my godbrother here!
Thank you 干弟 for the wonderful time during WoW, where God moved powerfully in our midst. It is really awesome to see God empowering you to lead the devotions that caused many of us to confess our sins & repent, and brought Shiru and Lisa (our new sisters in Christ!) into the bond of Love. i’m very proud of you (=
May you find the Holy Spirit our Comforter, Helper and Counselor as your best friend, and may God grant you knowledge, understanding and wisdom in abundance so that you will be more effective for Him. <3
9. The evergreen sisterhood
My dearest fellow darling (you know who you are) babes of BB. Thank you for the wonderful times we had praying with one another, to seek God Himself, to seek for His counsel to handle all the mess we got ourselves into, and for our friends and families etc, throughout the course of this tumultuous year. The spiritual connection we shared at various points in time were astounding, and heartening as well. Thank you for the times where we opened up ourselves to one another with all honesty and vulnerability, for that speaks of trust and genuine love, the kind of friendship that is so so so so difficult to find nowadays!! How precious it is.
i pray sincerely that each and every one of us will enthrone Jesus as our First Love, because He is the center of all things, and in Him all things hold together (that include our sanity, and the sisterly love that we share). 2009 may be insane to us at times, but with God as our guide, and with each other by our side, we will brave through the storms, sure and stedfast!
BB GIRLS FOR THE WIN!!!!!!! =D
Relationships
1) BGR
Not ready to blog about it yet, but i do have a lot to say about it… till a more appropriate time, i promise.
Just in case anyone gets a wrong idea, i have made a covenant with God since 15, to abstain from BGR till 20 years of age. i have not, and will not break it.
2) Friendship
In an old blog post written on 21/09/2007, i wrote, “Talking about friends, to me, it has always been the quality and never the quantity. i’m contented to have a handful of close friends instead of a bunch of acquaintances. Then again, quantity is potential quality; the acquaintance of today might be your intimate friend tomorrow. Therefore, i will breakthrough my cocoon, be much more outgoing, and make lots of friends in the years ahead. Hahas, sounds like an emergence of a social butterfly!”
Coming to ACS, joining FireAC and BB are the best decisions i’ve ever made after The Best decision to follow Jesus. Actually God made those decisions and presented them to me (so i can still choose to turn them down) and i merely obeyed willingly. Not only did i find God and encountered Him more profoundly, i began to chum around, and gained many genuine and rare friends. These friendships seem too good to be true, but they really do exist, because they are anointed by the Presence of God. In His Presence, miracles are the norm.
Besides those mentioned above, there are people like Nicole Poh and Timothy Liang who are my best female friend in class and best guy friend in BB at this point in time… and many more close friends to name. Thank God for every single one of them <3
Work
1) BB
The late nights of churning out policy paper, standard operating procedures, administrative instructions etc have taught me the art of administration and increased my capacity and tenacity. It’s all worthy it.
2) Academic
The only regret i have this year is not working hard enough on my school work and getting average grades (tho i do give thanks for God’s grace in this). Then again i must thank people who helped me along the way, Jiayi (a year 7 who is studying in UCL now) for all the textbooks she passed me. John for tirelessly explain concepts, giving me his book, lending & giving me his notes, and for his encouragement. Kenneth, Timlim and Emil for giving me their notes and encourage me from time to time. Daniel and Charles for helping me with Econs. Audrey for all the precious notes and the help she willingly offered etc. Jayne, Sam, Pet for taking notes and sharing them generously with me. Nicole for giving me study tips and inspiring me to study smart. Tina for her company in and out of intensive mugging season, and for her notes. Even Timliang, for indirectly helping me with Bio, and reminding me to work hard.
2009 must be different. Studies will climb up my priority ladder but i do not want to compromise on Spirituality and significant friendships as well. So it will be a year of discipline (it is true that i lack self-restrain this year, wasting time on unproductive things) and faithfulness. And ultimately, that of fruitfulness! =)
To God Be The Glory. The Best Is Yet To Be!
=D Have a blessed and bountiful 2009 ahead!
So glad i went for today’s service
There were hardly any dry eyes among us this evening…
Indeed God has revealed more of His goodness, power and glory through healing our sister Danielle of cancer.
Our eyes have seen and hears have heard a beautiful testimony that speaks of the compassion and character of Jesus and the deep love among members of His body.
A little faith will bring your soul to heaven,but a lot of faith will bring heaven to your soul.A lot of faith and more will bring heaven through your soul-Dwight L. Mood & me
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease
I trust in You
I believe You’re my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You’re my Portion
I believe You’re more than enough for me
Jesus You’re all I need
My Healer, You’re my Healer
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands
A weekend to remember
It dawned on me that the period after exams and before the release of results is more of a holiday than the official ones. (x
Monday to Thursday
Can’t remember much, apart from the day where we could wear whatever we wanted, watched soccer and ate the sponsored ice-cream. That i disappeared from the face of the Astroturf area during the matches, stayed on the Balcony, before praying with Pet on the staircase to the Primers Room. May God bless her family through this time.
Oh, and yea, i studied Econs while John and Audrey were mugging for their Business papers. Level 5 benches till 7 plus.
Friday
* Got a rude shock during white space upon the reception of my poor Chinese A2 results.
Got somewhat disillusioned because i studied harder for this exam than all other tests that i’ve done well for.
* Had an unofficial Pitstop with John and Malcolm in one of the Library Reading Rooms.
Isaiah 58
What i saw and heard is truly worth to be treasured dearly in my heart and mind, and effectuated.
* Moved to admin room in the hope to do my TOK essay.
Hahas, the Band people were there, including my hyper Y2 juniors who were learning to wear turban from Utube.
* Jayne dear was down): Karlo and i accompanied her to Holland V for some comfort food and wow, met more than 5 ACSians within less than 10mins, including Charles who insisted on treating us Cheese cake, chocolate cake and 2 drinks from Coffee Bean. ~(:
Apparently, Charles was interacting with 2 of the admin-to-bes, before going to church for some ministry stuff, then to PassionAC. The amazing thing is that he has the knack to bring the big wide world into our little worlds through captivating stories etc. For instance, he shared with us his backpacking experiences, introduced to us the ladder theory, told me how he reads etc etc.
(: We all had a good time.
My juniors are like how cool! Chose to cycle from school to Holland V and back. xD
* PassionAC!!!!!!!
Oh my, it was truly a night of spiritual passion, where God came and ministered to our hearts and minds! It was also my first time in ACJC, and i like her very much. After all we’re all a part of the AC family, so i felt at home in there too. <3
The message through Pst. Hanson Lim was of the Holy Spirit, powerful and edifying. We need more Pastors like him! Those who preach the undiluted truth boldly without frills, yet not without a sense of non-sarcastic humour. (:
During the altar call, i was pleading with God not to touch and pass us by, but to reside in the highest place in our hearts lastingly and eternally (i so fear that like what it usually is, that many will fall back to normal mode of life over time). Once again God assured me that He’s faithful and the ignited moment was sealed by the promise of the Holy Spirit, but people need to be faithful and diligent in crucifying the flesh, carrying the Cross, and drawing nearer to Him on a daily basis too.
A CFer named Andrea came and prayed strong for me with the Gift of Knowledge and prophesy. Later on when i told her how precise and potent it was, she was greatly encouraged.
Mutual encouragement wow!
Amazing people!
Saturday
* Mr Khoo briefed the entire company on BB Cares for MCYC Zoo visit and said that my “usual gang” and i will play a significant role in it. Tim Liang, who was sitting next to me, asked in his usual dreaming state since when did i become a gang leader.
* Mr Tan and i replaced Russ and Leb (went for Bagpipe competition) for Y2 Bible study. Tim Liang tagged himself along too, hahas.
There’s much to pray for and work on.
* Disappeared after lunch for about an hour.
* MCYC visit was a Boom! 8 of us went. The message shared echoed what we had during PassionAC, there was a Birthday celebration, got multi-owned by little and not-so-little pros at the table soccer stations and played intellectual games. Jeremy Kong is the bomb at word games! Created a lot of jokes and even new words such as “emolize” (by a guy there, while we were on our way to the MRT station). (x Kim is my home going buddy from MCYC! <3
Sunday
* Service was awesome. Pastor preached on the definition of Spirituality, which is yet again, directly linked to the PassionAC sermon.
1 Cor 2:12-16
Here the judgement does not mean the critical & cynical one which makes one put off by what he sees, it’s the kind that seeks to discern, understand and assimilate.
A spiritual person is hard to fathom by carnal means.
Spirituality, contrary to superstitious beliefs, is not something mystical/ spooky, but is having the mind of Christ! The mind of Christ has to do with character leading to Christ-likeness.
All the things God has brought me through over the weekend have amounted to an amplified resolving power (The smallest distance apart that two objects can be, and still be seen as two distinct objects) of my perspective. Indeed the essence of profound insight it simplicity. At least i now know what to pray and watch out for specifically.
* Finally finally went swimming!! xD
The rhythmic sound and movement of the embracing water are very conducive for prayerful contemplation between laps of buoyant physical assertion. Got rather impatient for certain personal things, so i confided in God and asked for His direction. The answer is simply “wait”.
Oh well…
Ahh, time to work on TOK, IOP, IAs and EE!!!
1984
A puff of air wipes away that fragile flame of hope before vanishing into the still nothingness…
That’s how i felt when my gaze departed from the last words of Orwell’s masterpiece.
It wasn’t like that during the process of reading, back then thoughts and feelings this formidable novel evoked within me were like recurring storms and floods, so overwhelming that i had to place the book aside, close my eyes, and wait for them to take their courses and subside.
For instance, i tried to imagine myself living in Oceania. i also tried to establish a link between this dystopia and the world i know.
Within the former thought, i came to the decision to commit suicide. Of course, that is a grave sin, an outright violation of the 6th Commandment. Yet, i would still do it, because i thought that the Ministry of Love would eventually thrust me to blaspheme against the Holy Spirit, which is an unpardonable sin, and i reckoned it is better for me to die in a grave sin than an unpardonable one, and die as a human being with a vital heart and a conscious mind, rather than an eroded heart and a deluded mind. In such context, suicide is more of an act of defiance than a measure of defeat.
Within the later thought, i recalled the things i learnt in History classes (e.g. Stalinism with his Great Terror etc) and from other sources (e.g. stories of the Chinese Cultural Revolution from my grandparents’ personal recounts etc etc). After a while, it occurred to me that the common ground is the dark side of human nature (there are others like “rulers of the darkness of this world“, but i’m not going into the supernatural realm here & now).
We human beings, in our depravity, given the “right” ideological condition, are capable of despicable acts (the Stanford Prison Experiment is one of the many examples). In fact it can be so despicable that it becomes like autophagocytosis, for example, “The sex instinct will be eradicated. Procreation will be an annual formality like the renewal of a ration card. We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now.” When i went through those lines, i went “what?!” with incredulousness, because it’s just so ridiculous! Is sex merely catered to the mechanical production of offsprings? Why would God bother to design the anatomy in such a manner that the genitals have a more complex network of nervous receptors and blood vessels, and why does sensory perception have such a profound impact on our state of being? The sex instinct in human is to be harnessed and sanctified, not suppressed (cos “what you resist, persist”) or eradicated. After all, the true value of this intense and ecstatic experience lies in the mutual expression and reception of love, and intimate & wholesome bonding between a man and his wife. Eradicating what is essentially human (esp reason and consciousness, and even sexual instinct) strips off the human nature in its goodness, so that one is reduced to a chunk of walking meat, which is even worse than an animal (who gets to be who it really is).
In the afternoon, i went to church, and found it difficult to worship. The dark and rancid air from the novel shrouded me, and i was in a state of mourning. However, God’s presence, thick among the assembly of worshippers, embraced me and the small still voice spoke to my heart. i confess that failed to give Pst Josh Kelsey my full attention. Sorry! >< Throughout the worship, sermon and communion, God brought to my mind various verses and images, such as the Book of Daniel, Psalms 118 (esp the center verse of the Bible), Proverbs 3:5… the image of Jesus on the way to the Cross, His death at Calvary etc. Basically, i was being gently rebuked (personally more effective than a harsh one which actually makes me feel better, the way an eye-to-eye, heart-to-heart “talk” from mum was harder to swallow & more lasting to digest than a good spanking, back in my pre-teen years) by God for trusting in the oppressive power of destructive men and the lack of faith in the power of the Holy Spirit. Once again, He reminded me to shift my focus away from the power and weakness of the flesh, just surrender them, and look to and follow Jesus, the perfect example who was faithful and victorious till the very end, and still is, from everlasting to everlasting. Amen!
Tragedy occurs when Depraved Men try to play the Sovereign God…
Ultimately, the book is a double lie that speaks of death that points me towards the sole Truth and Life. Indeed, Colossians 1:16-17!
Oh, and yes, Eric Arthur Blair was a genius. i find him so, in every sense of the word.
ACS Day!
It has been a memorable day.
*God chose to shower pails of blessings upon all who were present on the Parade Ground this morning, especially members of the UYOs. The falling rain drenched us, the chilly wind aimed at our bones, the audible mockery of certain dude were hurled at us, but our marching standards were not compromised. i felt the rousing spirit of resilience and unity! And oh yes, as Jayne aptly put it, it was also “fun & wet”. (;
*Interacted with the toppers of the cohort after the March. The Y5 Primers’ club is also a den of crouching tigers and hidden dragons in the academic sense! We have the top IP boy, the first runner up, and almost all the Best in Subject Awards were secured by BB boys. Girls like Samantha and Petrina are also potential toppers with a whole lot of girl power. i’m inspired to uphold the excellent academic level of BB and glorify God with great grades with them.
*The Worship led by Mr Marc Ho was utterly heartening. i think he is anointed. (:
*Attended Bible Study – End Time Series right after Founder’s Day Cerebration. i pray that the urgency and fervency that i have gained will persist and bear fruits.
*i was supposed to study the history of USSR today, but i ended up studying the history of ACS(I). Oh no, oh no… but oh well, it’s ACS Day after all. (: i find the $25 bulky book our dear school made us buy engrossing. i was amazed at how ACS evolved from a less than mediocre school to a first-class institution she is today, was enthralled to read the illustrious profiles of the senior admins and student leaders, and was highly amused by the Lighter Moments section, especially the one from Huron Low (class of ‘04)…
Lord, thank You for the abundant portion of Gold. May Your Red wash over ACS, intensifying Blue.
Os and more.
O- Level Results
(: Thank God for the straight As, and especially for the A1s for English and Literature in English (a wild dream realized!! PASSION IS SUPREME!!!)! This means that i’m officially qualified to kiss Ms. Jacob (My Lit & Eng teacher)!
Okay, the story: On one steamy afternoon, Yewei (btw, she got 8 A1s and net 2 points for L1R5. 
Rocker dude!!) and i pursued Ms. Jacob in a desperate attempt to raise our English standards (i was mostly a B4 Eng student). After receiving a string of advices, i blurt out in a state of delirium (probably from lethargy and the afternoon heat), “Ms. Jacob, if i get an A1 for English for Os, i’ll kiss you!” i thought that would position her in a state of shock, but quiet on the contrary, she replied with a sweet voice, “Well, i will be looking forward to that kiss.” After a few months, during a Literature “lecture” that encompassed at least 3 classes (i.e. about 120 students), she announced through the microphone that i’ll be kissing her should i get A1 for both English and Literature. Silence. Giggles. Whispers… Rachel said that i should not be so “loose”.
Well, with such a crowd of witnesses, i got to fulfill my promise. However, i didn’t manage to do it on result release day because i forgot all about it, and spent time with dear Charmaine in the Hall and went to the Prayer Room with Nicole, Jieyi, Rachel and Valerie to give thanks. Hence, i need to somehow find a time to make my way back to SNG again to fulfill my promise. Probably when the O-Level Cert is ready for collection.
On a more subdued note, I did not do excellently well for Add Maths, Sciences and more tragically, Higher Chinese was an A2 too. In the end my L1R5 was a raw 8 and net 4. It’s sufficient for me to remain in ACS! The failure to attain the standard of excellence will drive me to work harder and smarter in IBDP, so it is a good thing after all!
i’ve just submitted my JAE application. ACS (I) remains as my one and only choice out of twelve. Pardon my ultra-subjectivity, but i seriously think and feel that no other school comes close to her. Incommensurable, that’s it. (;
Really got to give thanks to God for inspiring me and guiding me, especially during the Literature papers where i was empowered to write coherently in breakneck speed, something i could never accomplish with my own strength. The results are testimonies of His grace and hope for me; He has honored my hard work and egged me on towards betterment (for there is still much room for improvement).
More importantly, i’m grateful for the brothers and sisters i’ve gained in FireAC. There were so many sincere prayers (offered alone at home & in Primers’ Room, over the phone, spontaneously within the campus etc), words of assurance & encouragement, SMSes of concern & congratulations (more than 50 of them)… and the paid celebration “feast” at Wah Chee!!
Most importantly, i give thanks for the hopes and promises of the future in ACS. What a strenuous (the word God gave last year for me in the context of ACS was “stretch”) experience spiritually, psychologically, mentally, socially and physically it is going to be!
The burden is the call. When you feel something wrenching in your heart, you know you are ready to do something for God.
- Pastor Lia
:D
Wow, what a fulfilling week i’ve had!
Monday
* Daniel’s sharing during FireAC resonated with the devotion i had the night before!
* Took Jieyi’s amusing personality test. The results turned out to be hot.
* Met Ping and David Crawshaw(a guy with narcissistic complex. HA) in the library during break, and embarked on a Crawshaw Tour around the campus. A Sir asked him, “Where are you bringing the ladies?”, and said that he would keep an eye on him after warning us not to let him take us to dark rooms. We ended up in the Debate room where he tried to give me a Christian name while Ping was studying her Theater Arts notes, “…Sarah, the wife of Abraham? Mary, the mother of Jesus? Ruth? Esther? …How about Bathsheba?” 0_o
~Sign. It’s so inconvient to have a name that is difficult to pronounce. Others will try to name you or address you differently. Alistair (a guy from Chinese A2 class) tried to convince me that my name is actually Sarah, Madam (a Indian lady) who teaches me History told me to “better get accustomed to your new name”, which is Xue (read Swee), Mr Charles Ng (our BB Officer) tried to “knight” me with the title Stephanie before settling for Miss Xu….~
*Outreach was smooth and relatively effective. It can be much better!
Tuesday
* My dream subject combination was granted, and i found out that it was the one and only in the entire cohort! Allocated to 5.17 Philippians. The last class with the weirdest subject combinations, the only Y5 class that is on level 3 (“cut off from civilization”), and the Non-intact class of all non-intact classes.
* Attended the first English A1 tutorial and was absolutely amazed by the intelligence, piercing perception and eloquence of my classmates who are either prized debaters, or Literature toppers (who scored 24/25 for EOY commentaries), or aspiring lawyers. There’s so much more for me to learn!
* Met up with Yewei and Bingqing at Orchard MRT before heading towards Taka to wait for Bixing who came back from Japan for a short stay. She’s more wild than ever, with revealing dress, hair extension, manicure that took 4 hours and cost S$300, and a generous boyfriend who treated us all for dinner. However, i sensed a sense of disillusionment beneath all that glamour… and it was particularly difficult to bid her farewell.
Wednesday
* Switched to 5.10 Samuel due to a clash in timetable.
* Attended another English A1 class due to the change. Madam was especially creative and zesty. One of the many things she discussed with us while annotating poems was that knowing a woman in the Biblical sense is also a spiritual experience. (;
* First Economics class. Love it!
Thursday & Friday
* Homework started to pile up, began to mug on the way, and study in the Library after school.
* Realized that there will no longer be any white space left and time has to be managed well.
* Transferred back to my first English A1 class. (:
* First TOK tutorial. Interesting!
Saturday!
* Primers’ Cycling Trip at Pulau Ubin! The highlight of the week!!
Thanks to the chivalrous patience of Mr Charles Ng, intellectual encouragment from Mr Marc Ho (Macho), Mr Nicholas Chen’s “tsks” and “aiyos” that provoked me sharpened my will to succeed, and the concerned attention from fellow Primers, i can finally cycle!! This, i believe, is the first of many essential life skills i’ll learn through my days in BB.
Learning to cycle was a deplorable yet invigorating experience. The Officers took turns to lead me on a tandem bicycle which proved to be a severe torture for them, especially for Charles who cycled over slopes. Later, i switched to a single bike and took extremely long to cycle forward. Thank God that apart from legs that looked as if they had been subjected to physical abuse (mostly through a headlong fall into the sideway bushes), there was no other serious injuries, and no shedding of blood. (:
i find the Officers inspiring. They lead lives that are rooted in God, and glorify God. Charles just graduated from Jesus College in the Oxford University, Macho and Nic are studying in NUS and the former is in Medical School. However, to them, all these achievements pales in comparision to the knowledge of the Lord, and they give themselves to the work of the Lord with good cheer. (:
* On the way back to school from Pulau Ubin, i asked Kenneth about Lenin since he’s a passionate and excellent History student. Guess what, throughout the long trip he gave a few other Y5s and i a lecture on Lenin, Stalin, Hitler, Mussolini (their rise to power, policies, ideologies etc) and touched on Wars! Amazing, what an ENFJ!!
* Met Jeremy and Raquel at Payar Lebar MRT and passed them the Ignite wrist bands.
* Returned library books, and dated mum for dinner.
Today
* Went for morning service. Pst. Joakim Lundqvist preached out of Daniel, a sermon that is to be carved in the heart.
O Level results will be released next week. i feel calm. Reckon it’s because God had assured me through Audrey when she said that if God wants me to be in the school, i will be. Hope i can remain with MOE scholarship!
